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The Icon Bar: News and features: Episode VI - Return of the JFPatch
 

Episode VI - Return of the JFPatch

Posted by George Lucas on 00:00, 1/4/2020 | , , ,
 
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...
 
*cue Star Wars theme*
Finally, it's here[1] - the cloud service that absolutely nobody asked
for, nobody wanted, and nobody will ever need!
 
JFPatch-as-a-service is now available at https://jfpatch.riscos.online/.
 
Harnessing the awesome power of cloud computing to provide the astounding
ability to build ARM assembly in a format that hardly anyone but the
author ever used. In the cloud. Did I mention that it's cloud based?
Because that makes it cool. Marvel at the astounding ability to create
26bit RISC OS modules that no modern hardware can run. Be shocked by the
complete lack of speed of building.
 
[1] For a short period.

*cut to C-3PO and R2-D2 making their way across Tatooine's surface*
 
R2-D2: Bleep bloop bleep
 
C-3PO: What do you mean you've never heard of JFPatch? It was written last century by one of the greatest RISC OS programmers of the time, gerph, who also went by the name -
 
R2-D2: Bleep bloop bleep
 
C-3PO: - yes, that's right. It allowed him to create many software patches and utilities which he then shared for free with people over the Internet. A true hero of his time! Unfortunately things took a turn for the worse when -
 
R2-D2: Bleep bloop bleep
 
C-3PO: - yes, that's right. For many years nothing was heard from him, and much of his software was lost from the Internet. But now he's back, and he's brought JFPatch with him! How marvellous!
 
R2-D2: Bleep bloop bleep
 
C-3PO: Yes, I know that he hasn't said how long he's back for or what his future plans are, but in these hard times we need to be thankful for every good thing that comes our way.
 
R2-D2: Bleep bloop bleep
 
C-3PO: *stops walking* Wait, it's just a "trendy" closed-source cloud service which could vanish at any moment, and doesn't work when accessed using NetSurf? Well, f -
 
*hard cut to next scene*
 

  Episode VI - Return of the JFPatch
  cmj (08:25 1/4/2020)
  arawnsley (19:16 1/4/2020)
 
Chris Johns Message #124783, posted by cmj at 08:25, 1/4/2020
Member
Posts: 9
Well that saves installing JFShared.

Now all we need in some Zap integration so you can launch the build from within the editor.

smile
  ^[ Log in to reply ]
 
Andrew Rawnsley Message #124787, posted by arawnsley at 19:16, 1/4/2020, in reply to message #124783
R-Comp chap
Posts: 535
The sad thing is that I enjoyed Gerph's Star Wars spoof maybe more than I enjoyed episode 9 when I went to the cinema over Christmas!
  ^[ Log in to reply ]
 

The Icon Bar: News and features: Episode VI - Return of the JFPatch